Having A PhD. Doesn't Make You a Relationship Expert

There are all kinds of books and e-books about relationships out on the market written by Ph.Ds. Does this mean that their advice is superior to someone who has been out in the trenches, had their heart broken a few times, lived through a break up or two, but also managed to put a relationship back together? Academics have many theories about relationships, but theories sometimes just don't apply to real-life situations. Read on for my take on what to look for in a book about relationships that has advice you can really use, not just psychobabble:


If your boyfriend has just broken up with you, you may searching for anything you can read about relationships to give you some insights on why the relationship failed. With all the various books, e-books, books-on-tape and more available on the subject of relationships, how can you choose one that really gives you what you need to know?


Don't just buy a book on relationships based on the author's academic credentials! This is a mistake! You don't want to buy a book on relationships based on whether or not the author has a PhD behind his or her name.--the PhD. might be in earthworm biology, not in the psychology of relationships. Just because someone has spent the bulk of their first four decades in the hallowed halls of academia doesn't mean that they know squat about a relationship. They may be experts on paper, but wouldn't you rather get dating and relationship advice from someone who has lived through the ups and downs of break-ups and make-ups, instead of from someone who has only read about them?

To give an analogy, if you were about to head off to war, would you rather get advice from a tough Marine who has been a career soldier, or a history professor who has studied the Battle of Gettysburg ad nauseum? I thought so.

Look for books on relationships by authors who have experienced being in a bad relationship, and worked hard to make it become a successful one, or from someone who gives solid advice to others and have helped them mend relationships. They care about helping real people in real relationships just as much, and probably more than someone who charges over a hundred-dollars an hour for their "help."

Don't settle for a book or e-book that gives you the worn-out advice of "don't respond to your ex-boyfriend's calls for the next month, and in the meantime, get yourself a sexy new hairdo." These types of books are a dime-a-dozen; you want a relationship book that will give you new information about how to revive your relationship.

For example, will the book tell you what makes men cheat? Will it give you specific advice on what to do to recover from an affair, and how to mend your broken relationship, step-by-step? Will it give you advice on how to make your opening move in getting your ex-boyfriend return your calls? Or does it just rehash old information?

You also need to check out reviews or testimonials written by people who have actually bought the book or e-book. Just because the book works fantastically well for 4'11' blondes who drive Porsches and live in Switzerland doesn't mean it will work well for you. Look for an e-book on relationships with testimonials written by people from all walks of life, from different countries, and have been in different situations that led up to their relationship problems. When you see reviews like these, you'll know that you're on to a winner. Don't buy an e-book on relationships because the author's mom says that it's a great book. Look for specific ways that the reviewer says that the book has helped them. If the reviews are a little too generic, they may be lacking in sincerity.

If you're determined to repair your relationship with your ex-boyfriend, finding e-books that really work take time and effort to locate. But if you decide that getting back with your ex-boyfriend is what you really want to do, and would make your life feel complete again, taking the time to find such a resource is worth it, wouldn't you say?
 
 For my recommendation on an e-book on relationships with REAL ADVICE for REAL PEOPLE, not for lab rats,

Click Here!


Jen Thomas writes on relationships and how to prevent breakups. For her best tips on how you can avoid breaking up or even how to get back together after a breakup, visit her site Stay Together Now. If you want to stay together, Jen has the answers for you--common sense stuff, no psychobabble here!


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